


The Way Things Are

by Seblainer



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Points of View
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-21
Updated: 2007-12-21
Packaged: 2019-02-05 15:02:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12796926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seblainer/pseuds/Seblainer
Summary: Lindsay's thoughts at the end of season 5. Sequel to: 'The Way It Should Be.'





	The Way Things Are

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

Lindsay’s POV

 

I know that I did the right thing, when I showed Brian the article about Justin. It was the only thing I could do, to make absolutely sure that Justin would leave. I knew that Brian would make him go to New York.

 

At first, I believed that I wanted Justin to go and pursue his art in New York. Well, I did, in a way. The truth is I wanted Justin to leave, so that he and Brian would no longer be together.

 

I wanted Brian to myself. Well actually, not all to myself. I’d still have to share him with Gus. Not that I mind. Brian and Gus are the two most important people in the world to me.

 

I don’t know what I would do if I ever lost Brian. I almost did, actually. I was horrified when Brian told Justin that he loved him. It was even worse when Brian asked Justin to marry him.

 

I swear my heart broke into a million pieces, and I knew, I just knew, that I couldn’t let them stay together. I was looking for a reason to break them up, and when I saw the review in the paper, I knew I had found it.

 

The review was my excuse to have Justin out of our lives, and for us to go back to the way things were meant to be. Brian is an over-the-hill club boy, who is never going to grow up.

 

So in actuality, I did both of them a favor, by breaking up their relationship. Justin is way too young to know what he wants, and even when he would have figured out what he wanted, Brian would have never given it to him.

 

It’s like Brian has always said, he’s better off just fucking, not falling in love, or dealing with all the romantic crap. To Brian, it’s all just a load of emotional garbage, which we vomit up all the time to make each other feel bad.

 

The weird thing is I don’t feel bad for getting rid of Justin. I mean sure, I pushed him to go to New York, but in the end, it was his choice. He was the one who decided that his career was more important than Brian.

 

I never would have pushed Justin to leave, if I thought that he and Brian would ever be a real couple. I mean, they have dealt with a lot, sure, but only because they have had to.

 

They don’t love each other. They can’t love each other. Neither one of them really know what love is. Justin is just a child, crushing on Brian. Brian is just trying to relive his youth with Justin.

 

The two of them never would have worked out, even if I hadn’t interfered. Brian needs someone who he can pretty much control, and Justin is not that person. Justin is his own man, who likes to be in control.

 

The ‘l word’ alone, would have ended things for them. Justin is too nice for his own good. He claimed that he didn’t want Brian to change, yet he never told Brian that, or tried to stop him.

 

Besides, it’s not like Brian would have actually gone through with the wedding anyway. He wouldn’t be able to handle being in a monogamous relationship. Hell! Even just saying the word ‘monogamous,’ makes him have a fit.

 

But the bottom line is that Justin and Brian didn’t really love each other. There was way too much hurt between the two of them, for there to ever be any type of love.

 

And now, this brings us full circle. I’m not sorry for what I did. I never will be. I wanted Justin gone, because I always wanted Brian to star in my heterosexual fantasy of him, myself, and Gus, being a perfect family.

 

I can admit that now, but only to myself. I love Melanie, but in my heart, she will always be second place to Brian. I know that it irks her to no end, but that’s just how things are.

 

Everything would have been perfect, but then Justin came along and ruined things. Now though with the way things are, Brian hates me. I have to say it’s a small price to pay, for getting him back to normal.


End file.
